I want to go to the gym regularly.
I want to eat healthy.
I want to craft more often.
I want to read more.
I (and so many others)
Do these goals sound familiar to you? I used to set myself goals like these for almost all my life. And almost never managed to achieve them. I doubted myself, felt useless and like I had no discipline and as if I am a loser. My attempts to eat healthy food lasted two months, if at all. It was difficult and feeling like a failure is never a good feeling. So, when the new year of 2018 arrived, I, like so many others, wanted to start new – a fresh start with new goals. Only this time it would be different – I would achieve my goals and feel good about myself at the end of the year.
What I changed this time
At the beginning of the year, I came across the book Stick with it. The Science of Lasting Behaviour by Sean Young and it changed the way I set goals now. He argues that a goal that takes “more than three months to accomplish”, is a dream. You have to keep the dream in your mind and then pick a goal that you can accomplish within one week to a month. So break down your goals into very small steps. You will see the results very easily. Imagine my goal would be to lose 20 kg. It will take such a long time before I can achieve this goal, that I am very likely to give up on the way there. But if my goal is to prepare a healthy lunch for work for one week, it is manageable. I can do this and be proud of my accomplishment – after one week already!
Another important factor to achieve your goals is to make it yourself as easy as possible. One of my goals was to work out more often, so we got a rowing machine and a stepper for at home. Super easy – all I have to do is put on my sports clothes and go to another room. No “But the rain/cold/sun” excuses, no “But the gym is already closed” talk. After a while, the home gym was not enough anymore, so I started looking for gyms in my area. And found one – 7 minutes walking and the opening times are awesome: Mo-Fr: open around the clock, Saturday and Sunday from 8.00 to 8.00. Wonderful! Another thing I have changed was to talk about my goals. I made sure that the people closest to me knew what I wanted to achieve. This way I felt some external accountability and knew I could reach out in case I needed help or support.
The last and final step was to visualise my goals and achievements.
When I read about setting goals, I often read advice like “Draw a picture to see what your life will be like once you achieved the goal”. For many, this might be ideal. For others, like me, this does not work. First, because I cannot draw and would only get frustrated and second, because it gives me the feeling that “everything will be better once you achieved the goal” and this is a mindset, I do not want to have. I do not believe that my life will change dramatically if I read more or craft regularly. But this might be because I have had this way of thinking for a very long time when I was younger (eating disorder) and I can tell you, my life was not better just because I lost weight and reached my goal.
For me, the focus is now on the process. I want to enjoy the way and not only the end/achieving of the goal. If I am not able to enjoy the process, I know that I will replace my goal with another one and another one and this way, I will NEVER achieve any final goal/dream.
Step-by-step-guide to achieve your goals
Step 1: Break down your goals into
very small steps.
The goal ” I want to read more often” is too broad. Make it “I want to read 20 minutes before I go to work this week”. For example, my goal for 2018 was to read 40 books. This was my, as Young calls it, dream. So I broke it down into small goals which were very easy and fast achievable.: Goal 1: Read in the tram on my way to work for one month. Goal 2: Read 20 pages per day for one week. Goal 3: Read 50 pages per day for one week. Goal 4: Read 50 pages per day for two weeks. And so on. Imagine I only had the goal to read 40 books in a year, it would take me such a long time to achieve this goal and feel the rush of reaching a self-set goal.
Step 2: Make it easy for yourself.
Don’t think that you will join the gym 15 minutes away. Sign up for the gym that is on your way home from work, or that is just around the corner. I, for example, know that I am very unlikely to go to the gym after work, so I chose a gym that is open before work. Now I get up at 5 in the morning and can work out in my gym because it is open 24/7 during the week. This is ideal for me and I only skip a day in the gym when I am really not feeling like going or am sick or travelling.
Step 3: Communicate your goals
and create a community.
I was always shy about my goals and realised this year that it was partially because they seemed so unrealistic, not reachable. With my very small goals now, I find it much easier to share them. It happens often that I tell my friends about my goals for weightlifting in the gym and then, a couple of weeks or even days later, I inform them proudly that the goal we talked about was reached. It makes me proud of myself. It helps a lot that my boyfriend is such great support and we often go to the gym together. His support is also very visible in step 4.
Step 4: Visualise your goals and
achievements.
It might sound cheesy, but my boyfriend and I have created a vision board in our living room. It is a pinboard divided into three columns: One for the current month, one for the next month and one for in 4 months time.
At the end of each month, we sit down and write down our goals for the next month (column 1). One goal on one post-it. We write down until when we want to achieve it and hang it on our vision board. Once we have reached a goal, we write the date of achievement on the back and put the paper in our goals-glass. This way, we see 1. that our goals to achieve are getting less and 2. that our glass with achievements is getting fuller and fuller. At the end of the year, we sit together and look through everything we have achieved. My boyfriend told me that it helps him to just stand in front of the board every now and then and to look at his goals to work maybe a little harder in the gym.
The goals in the second column (next month) are goals that we think we can achieve within two months times. This can be, for example, an increase in repetitions in the gym for one exercise or 3 hikes of more than 15 kilometres (the latter is an actual goal we had this summer)
The goals in the last/third column (4 months time) are our dreams. In the time leading up to this month, we will write down small goals for our monthly overview that will, eventually, lead to the bigger goal.
My goals for 2019
I love making lists and setting myself some challenging goals. And I cannot deny that a new year always makes me extra-excited to set goals. So, without much further ado, here are my goals for 2019. I have divided them into categories and will show you how my small goals will lead, eventually, to a bigger goal.
Zero waste
Dream: To live almost plastic-free
- Buy shower gel and hair shampoo without packaging the next time I have to buy these items
- Find a recipe/instructions on how to make deodorant myself
- Make deodorant myself once mine is used
- Buy nuts and potatoes on the market for one month (mid-January – mid-February)
- Tidy up the bathroom stuff and get rid of things I never use
- Put cutlery into my locker at work
- Make paper out of wrapping paper (used) and re-use it
Reading
Dream: To read 52 books in one year
I already read a lot and often so the goals for this category are more to challenge myself even more
- Read 30 minutes before work for two weeks in a row
- Read 30 minutes before going to bed for two weeks in a row
- Participate in one reading challenge (for one month)
- Read one book in a day – 4 times
Knowledge
Dream: Never stop learning
- master the Sporcle quiz “Countries of the world“
- master the Sporcle quiz “Countries of the world – the prequel“
- give a presentation on Henry VIII
- publish one blog post about Franz Kafka
- participate in a pub quiz
Creativity
Dream: Craft on a regular basis
The goals here are a little broader, once I will start with one of them I will break them down into even smaller steps.
- sew a patchwork blanket with the fabric I already have
- sew one piece of clothing
- design my own patterns for stitching ( wall of stitches)
- change the guest room from a travel-room to my own vision-room
- create one handlettering poster for our home
- make something from concrete
- create a photography calendar for 2020
- participate in a handlettering workshop
- host a crafts-night for friends/family
Sports
The goals here are a little broader, once I will start with one of them I will break them down into even smaller steps.
- Hike 4 times more than 15 kilometres in summer
- row 10 km
- row 15 km
- row 20 km
- go on the Stairmaster for 20 minutes straight
- deadlifts: 60kg (4×20)
- try three new exercises
- squads: 45 kg (4×20)
- pushups: 5 in a row
What are your goals for 2019?
